Dark Wings, Dork Words

Epic.  Jon leads his coalition of loyal troops to face off against the Boltons in a last ditch effort to reclaim Winterfell, and just about everybody dies in the ensuing battle.  Too bad Rickon never learned to serpentine.  Littlefinger's Army of the Vale swoops in at the last possible second to save the lives of Jon and Tormund.  Wun Wun is felled by arrows after smashing open Winterfell's gate.  Ramsay comes to regret starving his hounds.  Oh and Dany and her dragons get the best of the Masters of Slaver's Bay.  They are careful to not burn all the boats.  Then Yara and Theon pop up to make a deal.

Arya graduates early from Faceless Man U.  The Hound joins the Brotherhood without Banners.  Jaime achieves a bloodless coup at Riverrun.  Brienne fails in her mission to recruit the Blackfish, but gets to keep Oathkeeper as a consolation prize.  Bronn plays grab-ass with Pod.  Tommen takes trial by combat off the table.  Qyburn and Cersei have a lead on a useful rumor.

The Hound returns, and chops lots of wood.  Jaime puts some Freys in their place by taking over their pitiful siege.  The Blackfish is unimpressed.  Edmure Tully is grateful to not be hanged.  Yara tells Theon he needs to man up.  Sansa, Jon and Davos start recruiting troops to take back Winterfell.  Arya runs afoul of the Waif.

Sam and Gilly find no thrill up on Horn Hill, but they do come away with some valyrian steel.  The High Sparrow gains the upper hand, with Tommen sitting in the palm.  Exit Hodor, enter Coldhands.  Dany appeals to her base by demonstrating her riding skills.